Oh, what a wonderful time we all had at the 2nd annual Roger Bennett Memorial Concert. A special thanks to the Hoppers, who were amazing. They had some really neat stories to share about their memories of Roger, and it was very heart-warming. Of course, they presented an awesome concert, as usual, and everyone seemed to have a great time! Another special thanks to the Citizens Bank of Batesville, AR, for their generous support of the event. That's a real community bank - they support many causes there!
I told you in my last post that I would share some more stories with you that I heard at NQC. They are WAY too many to list, but there is one in particular I want to share (and I hope the teller won't mind that I shared it.....). I am going to leave out names, though. It seems that, many years ago, there was a father and son who attended Gospel concerts. The son's mom had left them when he was only 10, and it really did a number on a young boy. He did, however, have an interest in piano, and loved to hear Roger play. So, at a concert, they approached Roger, and he sat down and talked to this boy for a while, and then Roger gave the boy one of his instructional piano videos and told him to practice. Well, the boy did practice - so much so that his dad would have to drag him away from his keyboard every night to eat. Today, that little boy is the pianist for a well-known Christian artist, and his dad felt inspired to share that with me. Needless to say, he and I both shed some tears over that exchange. It just goes to show us all that we never know the impact we might have on someone's life, simply by taking the time to listen, share, and care. That's the kind of person Roger was, and his actions still inspire me today. I want to be that selfless, and not because I think it would make ME shine, but I want CHRIST to shine through me!
I had a great visit in AR, and was able to spend more time with my folks than I have in a long time. Doug, Roger's dad, and I went to Strawberry to visit relatives, and that was a very good day, too. I even got to see my youngest nephew get married, and then got to spend a too-short afternoon visiting my childhood friends on the way back home. (That's a neat story, too, and one which I will share sometime.)
OK, many of you have asked, and have waited for me to answer (patiently, which I appreciate, since I am kind of private about some areas of my life), so here is an update. As you probably know, I have been seeing someone for a time now (longer than you actually know, because I still had my own issues to work out). I have struggled with moving on in my life, but in a nutshell, God has given me the peace to do so. I had an incredibly healing week at NQC, and was able to speak with many friends, who were all supportive, and gave me some wise counsel. So, I am telling you today that, although I will never lose the part of my "old" life, I am beginning a chapter in a "new" life now. God has sent a person into my life who understands that although my past is still tied to my future in many ways, I have room in my heart for more love. It is still a bit awkward, at times, mainly in dealing with close family, but God is working on all of that, too. I just have to have the faith that He is still in control, and He knows the outcome. Very little in my adult life has gone according to my plan, but I am still able to say "Thy will be done, Lord." So, all that to say that I am getting married again in a few weeks. I've decided to keep my name the same, though, because getting married at 48 brings a whole lot more legalities with it than getting married at 20 did.......houses, businesses, travel documents, accounts, cards, etc. It's just easier. I will, of course, share more later, but I need to go now and get some work done. I would highly appreciate your prayers, especially with the family thing, and also welcome your comments. I do feel so blessed by your love and support, and so grateful for your stories and memories of the special, special man I was so blessed to be married to for 25 years, 3 months. I learned much from him, and I remember him every time I sign that I am still
In His Grip!
Debbie
God Bless you Debbie,
I have been reading the blog for a long time but have never before posted a comment. Congratulations on your engagement and up coming wedding. I truly believe that the Roger whose posts I have read and whose ministry in music and song I so enjoyed and the one you speak so lovingly of would only be very happy that you are able to come to terms with his passing and be able to continue on living & loving with his memories intact. You will be able to use all that you and he learned while growing together as building blocks as you move forward with a new relationship. In time all will come to accept that you have made a decision that is right for you and blessed of God. May God continue to bless you richly on into your future. Blessings!
Posted by: Rev. Ken MacDonald | October 15, 2009 at 05:38 PM
Debbie,
You have been on our prayer list for a long time. We have prayed for God's will to be done in your life. I know that this has been your prayer for a long time. You are too young and beautiful to spend the rest of your life alone. God will work out the awkward situations that you mentioned. We look forward to hearing from you again.
He's Beeen There,
Henry and Peggy B.
Posted by: Peggy Bowdoin | October 15, 2009 at 07:14 PM
Congratulations Debbie, Here's wishing you and yours a long happy life together.
I lost my husband after 34 years together, and 2 children, and 9 years ago, the most caring, loving man I've ever known asked me to be his wife, and I've never regretted it for a minute. God does work in mysterious ways.
Brenda & Charles
Posted by: Brenda Wilson | October 15, 2009 at 07:18 PM
We've never met, but I have followed your blog since Roger's death. What a blessing it has been to me, especially in the last year. A little over a year ago, on our 23rd anniversary and at only 45 years old, my husband unexpectedly went home to be with the Lord. Seeing how you have made it through losing Roger, and then how you have been able to go on and make a new life, have been such an encouragement to me! I pray God blesses you as you begin the next chapter.
Posted by: Debbie D. | October 15, 2009 at 10:37 PM
Debbie,
I knew you had somebody but you blew me out of the water with saying it's already come to marriage! To think we never even knew his name and you're already marrying him! Not that that's bad, it's your business; just it was a bit of a shock. By all means you should move on with your life! Congrats anyway!
~Tina from Kalamazoo
Posted by: Tina Reynolds | October 16, 2009 at 05:18 AM
Debbie, I am so happy for you! I have never married, but have always felt that if someone is blessed with a wonderful marriage such as you experienced with Roger and then loses their mate, the one who has left would want nothing more than for the remaining spouse to find someone to once again love and share life with. Real love is not selfish and knowing how much Roger loved you, he would be the first to be cheering that you have opened your heart to someone else. Roger will never be replaced but isn't it wonderful that God made our hearts big enough to love more than one? May this "new life" bring you much joy.
Posted by: Robbie Nelson | October 16, 2009 at 07:13 AM
Debbie I am so happy for you. You have so much love to give and I know that Roger would understand and is in heaven giving his blessing. I would ask that you keep this blog going as all of us who read it like to hear from you and see how God is working in your life.
Posted by: Patty Spicer | October 16, 2009 at 08:09 AM
Debbie, Mom called me today and asked if I had heard the great news yet. So I had to come and tell you congratulations. You are a wonderful person and I am blessed to have as part of our family. I am very happy for you and wish all the happiness in the world. I am sure everything will work out just as the great Lord Almighty has planned for you. My God Bless you always. We love you!
Posted by: Melissa Johnston | October 16, 2009 at 09:36 AM
Debbie,
I lost my husband to cancer in 1995 & was alone for 8 years till God brought a good Christian man in our church into my life & we will have been married 6 years in Feb. I am happy for you as we all loved Roger so much but know you are walking with the Lord by your side & you also are too young to not be loved & have another happy marriage. May God Bless you in your new endeavor. Jan
Posted by: Jan Conner | October 16, 2009 at 10:03 AM
Debbie,
Congrats to you! How wonderful to find love twice!!! I am very happy for you, very happy! I have been waiting for this post as I sensed it coming for some time. You do wear your heart on your sleve which is a very good thing. May you be richly blessed, once again as you were before with this new man! This will be a very exciting chapter in your life. Of course when the big day has come we would love to see some photos posted!!! Again, congrats, you are a very sweet person.
Becky In Wisconsin
Posted by: Becky | October 16, 2009 at 10:31 AM
Dear Friend, I am so happy for you.
I can almost hear Roger say,that's my girl." It is wonderful to find love the second time. May planning your wedding,etc bring much joy. I enjoyed our visit at NQC and I am praying and know that God will work with feelings and problems that come from family and friends. Keep the faith. Love you lots and Brandea says its OK. Geneva
Posted by: Geneva Speas | October 16, 2009 at 01:10 PM
You go, girl!!! I'm so thrilled for you!! Now...we need PICTURES!
Posted by: Linda Trout | October 16, 2009 at 01:52 PM
Debbie, best wishes to you in this new chapter of your life. God is good and I'm happy for you. I know that God will bless you as you walk with Him.
Praying for all of you!
Blessings,
Ruth
Posted by: Ruth | October 16, 2009 at 01:52 PM
Debbie, I am grinning from ear to ear this is awesome. My first thought was Roger would crack some kind of joke then he would say sweetheart I want nothing but the best for my girl. That is what true love is all about. I know he would want this for you without a doubt. I would give you a hug if you were here. Just keep going thru those doors God has opened for you and our lives on this earth go by so quick and I don't think for one minute the plan is to set around and greeve forever. I am so excited for you my sweet coworker just got married again last year after losing her husband a few yrs ago and she is still beaming and she tells me often that I am so thankful that God allowed me the opportunity to Love 2 such precious men. Know that you have so much love and support from all of us. Can't wait to hear all about your special day. Be happy Debbie and let Christ keep shining thru your life as he has since the first time we ever got to know you. Thanks again for the hugs and kind words you give all of us at NQC as well. God bless you and look forwarding to hearing back from you. Your KY friend always, Love Becky
Posted by: Becky Arvin | October 16, 2009 at 02:09 PM
Debbie,
Prayers for your up-coming new marriage. Be patient with those who still need extra time. Not everyone heals in the same time and manner. Sometimes it can be difficult for others to make "changes" in their lives. We all move along at different speeds. I hope you will continue to post and keep us updated on the new love of your life. Congrat's and may the Lord bless you on this new journey...
Prayers,
Cheryl/Lenexa KS
Posted by: Cheryl Turnbull | October 16, 2009 at 02:19 PM
Hi Debbie,
I am SO happy for you and the blessed man who will be part of your life now.
Happiness and blessings to you both.
Hugs,
Ann
Posted by: Ann Woodward | October 16, 2009 at 11:14 PM
Congratulations, Debbie. I think it is wonderful that you are open to a new relationship. You have wonderful memories of Roger and a love that will never end. But as a husband, Roger is gone, and it is fitting for you to move forward according to God's will. This person must be a wonderful Christian man or you would not have that interest, and he would not be able to appreciate your past and offer you a future. Blessings to you, and I hope we'll find out who Mr. Wonderful is in the near future. Jeannie
Posted by: Jeannie | October 18, 2009 at 03:10 PM
I am very happy for you. I know you will be happy. I think about Roger everyday and really miss you. I would love to see you sometime when you are in Ar and talk . May God bless and keep you.
Posted by: Al Simpson | October 18, 2009 at 10:15 PM
Congratulations Debbie on your upcoming wedding. I will pray that God will help you and your close family with these transitions in your life. Thank you for continuing to share stories about Roger. I do hope you continue to keep this journal. I will pray that God will help you know what to think, do and say in every situation. It is a blessing to me to read the encouraging comments you are getting. Congratulations again,
Velmarie
Posted by: Velmarie | October 18, 2009 at 11:33 PM
Debbie, I am so happy for you! I lost the love of my life 5 years ago, but the Lord saw fit to bring another love into my life. We have now been married almost 2 years. Love is not divided, it is multiplied, and I am so grateful that God has multiplied love in your life. Keep us posted.
Posted by: Janet | October 19, 2009 at 10:41 AM
Debbie,
Reverend MacDonald has so very well expressed my sentiments, so I will just second his comments. May God richly bless you, your family and your upcoming marriage.
Posted by: Carol C. | October 19, 2009 at 04:03 PM
Debbie,
I am so glad that God has sent a special person in your life and that you will soon be married. I feel confident in saying that I am sure that Roger addressed the issue of your having another mate after he went to heaven. Roger was such a strong Christian person and I am sure that he would want you to have a special person to fill the great void of his absence. You were very loving and faithful to Roger. I pray that God will guide you and your family as you work through this transitional time. Thank you so much for sharing this major personal decision with us.
Love you in Jesus,
Posted by: Betty French | October 19, 2009 at 08:50 PM
Debbie: I have just read your latest posting as I was in Branson last week. I am so happy for you and that you have found another love in your life. Roger would be so happy for you as well! Please continue posting in this journal so that we may share in your happiness. Blessings, Wilda
Posted by: Wilda | October 19, 2009 at 09:34 PM
Dear Debbie, I am so happy for you on your upcoming marriage. My late husband had so many of Roger's good qualities. After he passed away, people would tell me ways he impacted their lives.Rodney's song, "FACES" remind me of Carroll & Roger so much.
We were married 51 years & were best friends. We loved going to SG concerts together. My health is so bad and at my age (72), I wouldn't saddle a man with a woman who is handicapped & couldn't take care of a husband as he deserves to be, so I will remain single. I live alone & I miss my husband so much, that I know the lonliness of not having a loving mate.
So, I am so very happy that you have found someone to share your life with. As young as you are, with your kids grown & busy with their lives, I have been praying that God would send someone to you to share your life with. PTL
I know, like my husband, Roger wants you to find happiness & love again.
Blessings to you, the kids and your new love as you stay.....
Firmly, In His Grip,
Jenell in Texas
Posted by: Jenell McNeill | October 20, 2009 at 04:34 AM
Congratulations, Debbie! I believe that this is a tribute to Roger. I have observed that the folks with the happiest marriages are the ones who often marry again when their loved one passes away. They have such good memories & marriage is a very positive thing to them. May the Lord richly bless you & your new husband. I've very happy for you.
Posted by: Gail in San Jose, CA | October 20, 2009 at 11:53 AM