More Bends in the Road of Life

OK, 2nd attempt at this post. I wrote a very heartfelt one this morning early, and then proceeded to lose it as I tried to post. Oh well, there is a reason for everything.

Life continues to be a whirlwind, but that is neither new, nor unexpected. Week before last, I was in AR, and we were trying to make some hard decisions concerning my sweet Daddy. My mother and brother who lives with them are just about exhausted with their tasks as caregivers (one of the hardest jobs there is), and Daddy was getting to the point where it was terribly hard for them to maneuver him around the house. After a lot of talking, we decided that we will try to keep him home as long as possible, with the aid of some additional help. Then, on Thursday, 4/4, we ended up having to take Daddy to the ER, and he was admitted to the MICU, where he still is. He has had no nourishment, other than IV fluids since his admission, and has been mostly unresponsive, except that he is in a highly agitated state, and his new health issues seem to be causing him a good deal of pain. It is so hard to see anyone you love in this state, but that "Daddy/daughter" bond makes it terribly difficult for me. As hard as it is to voice this, I have asked God if He doesn't see fit to restore Daddy to us for a while longer, to not let him linger in this condition. My mom is extremely tired, in addition to the grief she is feeling, and also the guilt, if she leaves him for any length of time (I soooooo "get" this). So, prayers for our family would be appreciated very much. My brother who lives with me and I are going back to AR on Monday for the week.

Since there will be more of us to divide time, I hope to be able to visit with Doug more this week in AR. He is doing well, except for a recent fall, which left his ankle very tender, and caused some scrapes and bruises. He didn't slow down much, though, and is staying busy, and making new friends.

Jordan and Jessica are doing well, and Jessica seems to be recovered from her recent illness. In fact, she has been recruited by the Miami Grand Opera for a role in their current production of "Romeo and Juliet" (go Jessica!). She will be in FL for a few weeks, doing what she loves - sword fighting! So, if you are in the area, be sure to go see my petite daughter-in-love, as she wields a huge sword, while doing flips and rolls, and being quite the star! Jordan is in CA, meanwhile, holding down the fort, and taking care of my 2 grand-dogs. I had to laugh this week, as he told me of their latest escapades. There has been a squirrel in their back yard for months, who has given them fits. Besides tormenting the dogs, he chatters incessantly, and often wakes everyone up. As Jordan was sitting on the couch, working on something, the dogs came in from outside, and sat at his feet. He reached down to pet them, and narrowly escaped petting the dead squirrel instead (we are not sure if the squirrel died of natural causes, or violent ones, but as their grandmother, I am going to say they had nothing to do with it). I just laughed, though, and told him "Welcome to the world of pet parenting!".

Chelsea continues to keep herself busy with work, church activities, and friends. She is planning a trip abroad in May, going to the wedding of a friend she made while on her mission trip in Poland, and then travelling and seeing other friends on the continent. Needless to say, she is very much looking forward to it. The back injury she received from her car wreck last summer flared up again yesterday, so I know she would appreciate your prayers for her in that respect.

As for me, I have Isaiah again this weekend, and am loving every minute of it. He is such a bright spot in my life (and everyone else's in this family), and he fills this home with joy and laughter when he is here. That boy is growing like a weed, and can give the best hugs! He is so happy when he is here with us, and none of us are ever ready for him to leave, but we are so very grateful to God for allowing us to remain in Isaiah's life, in whatever capacity He chooses. It doesn't stop the tears and heartbreak I experience every other Sunday when I have to take him back, though.

I still have unresolved legal issues, that apparently don't fit the timeline I had preferred. This is another area of my life in which I have had to re-learn lessons that I have learned many times before. I have never understood how I can so easily forget lessons that I thought I had tucked away in my heart for future reference. Thank God His mercies are new EVERY morning, and His faithfulness is great. It's apparent that, left to my own devices, I have a tendency to mess things up, so I stop several times daily to remind myself that GOD is in control, and I don't have to worry (then I forget again, and try to pick it up, and have to stop and start over again.....). Recently, I was reminded of a verse that I can now apply to my life in a whole different way. It's amazing how that happens. Truths that we may have read many times suddenly become real to us as they apply to us now. God left us such a wonderful gift in His Word. It never changes, yet it can appear new and fresh at the time we need it most. Exodus 14:14 (NIV) says, "The LORD will fight for you; you need only to be still". (KJV) says it this way: "The LORD shall fight for you, and ye shall hold your peace". Wow.

So, as I try my best to be still, and WAIT, and let the LORD fight the battles that lie ahead, I am confident that I have a Savior Who cares; Who loves me; Who will give me comfort, whatever the situation may be; and Who holds me gently

In His Grip!

Debbie

Comments

[Ruth Gilbert]

Oh Debbie...you are dealing with SO much! I can feel the suffering you are going through about your Dad. Just remember that you have "friends" who care! I read this quote from Oswald Chambers' book, "My Utmost for His Highest" and it helped me so much I thought it might help you: "Cast your burden on the Lord..." You have been bearing it all, but you need to deliberately place one end on God's shoulder." That just gave me such comfort visualizing God on one end carrying my burdens.
Love you!
Ruth from Texas

[Shanna Locker]

Thank you so much for sharing what is going on in your life with those of us who care about, and pray for, you. Overwhelming sounds like a good word for your life at the moment. Isn't it sweet to know that our God is never overwhelmed?!?! I pray for you daily and am also remembering Cheryl Arneson as she deals with her grief. It is an honor to intercede for fellow Believers - even ones that I've never met. Stay strong Debbie and stay very close to God!
Praying for you, ~Shanna Locker~

[Barb]

Thanks for sharing Debbie, been thinking and praying for you lately. You have so much on your plate, but continue to praise God! You are such an inspiration to me, you ae amazing. I hear so well how hard it is with your dad. My mom is almost 94 and we are keeping her at home, and her needs are so high. It is over whelming at times, she is the sweetest mom and none of us can see putting her in a nursing home. She is looking so forward to going to Heaven. Please take care of yourself too, you are so loved by so many of us.
Barb

[Barb]

I need to get the book by Oswald Chambers, that Ruth from Texas mentioned. Sounds like something I need to read. Thanks Ruth for the input.
Barb

[Bernice]

We appreciate you sharing your life with us, so that we can pray for you. As I was praying today, and you came to mind before I read your note, God seemed to tell me that He so much wants to GIVE us His amazing Love, His amazing Grace and His amazing Peace. We just have to accept it all. Continue to accept all His help and blessings and you (and all His children) will remain in His firm grip, because He will never leave you nor forsake you. And that's a promise!

[C turnbull]

Debbie,
So sorry you are dealing with so much in your life right now. I cling to Isaiah 41:13 in my life. I know that the Lord always holds me by His hand. We don't have anything to fear when we turn it ALL over to Him. Take a deep breath, trust in Him, and see what God brings you through. You will look back on these trials one day knowing God never left your side. God is good and He loves you so much. I am praying for you.
Cheryl/Lenexa KS

[Ann Woodward]

Hi Debbie,
So glad to hear from you and that your kids are well.
I's so glad we have a heavenly Father who cares and comforts and meets our needs. I pray your family is touched with the energy and love and direction from Him as you care for your Dad.
Hugs,
Ann

[Becky Arvin]

Deb I read your message today and I cried. I was the care taker for my mom, dad, and brother. They are all in heaven now but I so related to all in your message today. I was a daddy's girl also and totally crazy about my mom and brother. It is hard to see them not be the way we know they want to be. We will just keep praying and trusting the Lord to do what is best. We are just so blessed to have been able to grow up with such wonderful parents and family. I don't take that for granted i was truly blessed.I just miss them all so much. I am glad the kids are doing ok and I too only have grand CATS but they are precious. I know Isaiah brings you so much joy and I am so thankful that he has that time with you. I will be praying for all of you and checking in to see how you are doing. Know that we love you and thanks so much for the love you share with us. Your KY friend Becky

[Laura]

Deb,

You are facing what so many of us are facing - the sandwich generation. We have parents to care for and children and grandchildren too. It is very overwhelming! Try to take time to pray and read God's work even if it is only five minutes. Also try to listen to Christian speakers when you are traveling in the car. The more we hear from His word and the more we focus on Him, the smaller our problems become. Thank you for sharing your heart with all of us. We care about you and are so proud of all you have already accomplished! Nothing is too hard for our Lord! In all thy ways, acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths. We love you and are keeping you in our prayers!

[JUDY HICKS]

Hello Debbie,
So glad to see your post with a report on all that is a part of your life. Sorry to hear that your dad isn't well. I totally understand your prayer as my mom is nearing 97 and tells me she is tired and doesn't understand why the Lord allows her to stay. As her health declines I ask that God will allow her to slip away in her sleep when the time comes. I am just so thankful that I have been blessed for 70 years of having my mom. Not everyone is so fortunate to have a parent that long.
Sounds like Chelsea has made many friends around the world and that she stays very busy..Hope that all goes well with Jessica and her new job..very exciting. And, Isaiah....what a lucky little guy he is to have you. I know he lights up your heart and keeps you busy...
Will keep you and yours in my prayers..especially your folks along with the "care givers". Thanks for sharing with us..You are loved.
Judy Hicks

[Linda in Ohio]

Oh Debbie, how sneaky our minds are. I have just been dealing with giving something very hurtful to the Lord asking him to take care of it for me. Thinking I had left it there with him I am then am so surprised to find out later on that here I am with that hurtful thing again. I have found Jason Crabbs son "thru the fire" so helpful to me lately. When the adversary says give in--just hold on. Our Lord will show up and he will take us thru the fire again. Just hold on Debbie. Our Lord will show up. Praise his name.

[carmen]

Thanks for reminding me that God is in CONTROL. My mother passed in January and the executor title has gone to his head. I had to get a court order to get my childhood and personal effects out of the home. In addition, care taking of loved one can take a toll. However, I hope everyone will pray that I have a great outcome and the Lord will have his angels for protection.

[Eugene McCammon]

Thanks for all your updates. Roger was a favorite friend. I often think of him.

Eugene McCammon

[Steve & Becky Robbins]

Dear friend;
I've never left a comment here for you, but my husband and I have been following you/Roger since the beginning. The road you have traveled has been a bit rough, but GOD IS FAITHFUL. Keep your head up and continue to be the Daughter/Sister/Mom/Mom-in-law/Grandma/Friend He created you to be. Phil.4:9
You are loved. ;)
Steve&Becky

[Becky]

Debbie,
I also posted 2x last week on the day you wrote but for some reason neither posts are appearing. I just want to tell you I am praying for you through all of your "junk" of life. How wonderful to think this "junk" as stressful as it may be and it is!...we only have to deal with it on a temporary basis. Blessings to all of you and for your daddy to be healed very soon either on earth or in heaven.
Becky In Wisconsin

[Rebecca Gardiner]

Debbie
Thank you so much for the update. I know that life can be very crazy at times, but I can also see that God is continuing to work in you life. I can totally understand your pain with your dad. I am 100% daddy's girl and it is very hard for me when is sick or hurting. Definately will continue to pray for you!
Rebecca Gardiner
Psalm 98:1

[glyndene deaton]

Hi Debbie,
Just a quick note to say we are praying for you and your family. Your Mom is such a precious person and surely needs Christian's to pray for strength for her as she cares for your Dad. He is definitely in a sad condition.
We are remembering you as you deal with life's trials.
Love,
Bobby & Glyndene

[Pamela Keller]

Debbie, it was so touching reading your note about taking care of your parents.....I too am a caregiver, to my parents and now my dying aunt....and though I wouldn't have it any other way, it does get very taxing on the body, mind, and nerves.

I knew Roger a long time ago, but I never had the pleasure of meeting you or your parents. I was singing with a group out of Walnut Ridge, and Roger would come to some of our practices, because he knew our piano player.....this was when he was still in college!....anyway, just wanted to say hello, and God bless you for what you are doing for your parents....prayers for your family, for the loss of you Dad....it just helps to know that we'll see them again someday.